|Formation||September 15, 2017|
|Extinction||January 13, 2020|
|Status||Rebranded to Wideboys|
|140~ (As of December 2019, exact figures not tracked after September 2019)|
|Affiliations||BEEFY BOYS (Trolling/Political wing)|
MOTHER (Intelligence/COINTELPRO Agency)
- 1 History
- 1.1 2017
- 1.2 2018
- 1.3 2019
- 1.4 2020
- 2 Members
- 3 Gallery
BMW, being a copyrighted international brand, was a name that obviously couldn't be used forever. Given the new nature of the group and its aims, Prude floated the idea of renaming to Wrongthink Tank on September 15th. The idea was very warmly received (outside of a few smoothbrains) and the old branding was mostly dumped, outside of keeping the BMW color scheme and still referring to members as Bimmers.
Destined to Suck
Destiny 2 showed promise as a new BMW group game, as many existing Bimmers had poopsocked Destiny 1 and were well versed in the mechanics and playstyle. The start was rocky from the very start, as TT of the SA Discord pulled a 180 and started his own clan instead of using BMWs (his clan died within 2 months) and then it was revealed that Destiny 2 would have no ingame text chat, further limiting recruitment possibilities.
Raiding was successful for a few months as AlexdeLarge came more into the fold, and Future led the raids. However, the game was not geared towards helping smaller clans, and after much debate, BMW decided to join into a larger clan. This, as Taylor said it would, did not help in the long run as the clan was poorly managed and filled to the brim with down syndrome squeakers. By the end of the year, Destiny 2 was essentially dead except for sporadic solo play by the more devoted players.
BMW vs Jim Lockwood
After Halloween, Duster and Buster (no relation) brought to WTTs attention the world of YouTube and Twitch talk shows, such as LiftTheVeil and other losers. Naturally of course, BMWs first course of action was to fuck with them. Duster and Prude both called in several times to LtV but never got any real traction because the host was a dweeb. After a few failed attempts to bit him, the group moved on to a small time Conservative host named Jim Lockwood, host of The Jim Lockwood Show, a conservative show in the style of Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity but without the charisma or eyesight.
Its a joke because he's blind.
The burn began slow, as Duster would call in under his Aztec Nationalism gimmick, which Jim would buy into. Things declined quickly as people would call in and simply state "I dont like black people". The epitome came when Taylor called in and led Jim on a 10 minute goose chase, before dropping the now infamous "State Mandated Anime" line on Jim, from which he would quickly end the show for the night.
The failure of Destiny 2 and the lack of any prospects kept growth and activity in WTT to a bare minimum in the first few months of 2018. However, out of that downtime, came new fresh ideas such as movie nights on WTTV and the opening of serveral game servers including ARMA III and Starbound.
Summer of Butthurt
Mid 2018, a bunch of people started getting their panties in collective wads.
In May, Tallgeese (known pedophile and degenerate) got angry at Prude for liking chicks with dicks and called everyone pedophiles and formed his own community that then splintered another 4 times until it was just a sad little circlejerk of unfunny Goons (See: The Goose Migration)
In July, The Wonka Rebellion rose up against our dear former leader, Taylor, and let loss The Ree Heard Around The World. Their goal was to poach Bimmers into their new totally elite gaming group. However, as predicted by Soothsayer Taylor, the venture flamed out in a few months without really taking anyone of note from BMW except some clingers.
Ironically, these series of splits spurred BMW to start moving in a different direction, including increasing the overall activity of the group and establishing weekly movie nights and game nights.
For the 3rd Anniversary of BMW, Taylor unveiled a new plan to reinvent BMW. Shedding the original perception of BMW as a massive fuck off group, the idea was to focus more on BMW as a close community and to set up weekly events for people to participate in. This included starting a Garrys Mod Trouble in Terrorist Town server, expanding the weekly movie night to two nights, and starting a Bimmer of the Month contest. It was a pretty good idea. The real extent of the plan however was not realized until March of 2019, when Taylor would abdicate the now refocused group.
Hype for 76 began right after its announcement at E3 2018. Many Bimmers pre-ordered and a few even pre-ordered the super expensive cool guy with a big dick package that can with a canvas bag (:ironicat:) and a power armor helmet.
Beta came in late October, and ran into early problems. On the morning of the first beta window, the Bethesda launcher deleted the entire 60GB game install for almost everyone that had pre-loaded, forcing everyone to re-download. For people with not fiber internet, this more or less meant that the first beta day was a bust since it would take at least 10-15 hours to re-download the massive ass game. Bethesda however took pity and added extra days. After the rocky start, the beta was more or less standard. Alex, however, was less than pleased and voiced his anger at the lack of an FOV slider and 16:9 support. He took to Reddit to bitch and eventually astroturfed a thread into bullying Bethesda to add the features.
When the game finally came out and the big dick dudes received their special edition. The helmet was rad af, but the canvas bag was less canvas and more shitty nylon. Alex once again took to Reddit to bully Bethesda and he eventually cucked them into agreeing to send everyone new and better bags.
Aside from that, BMW got a month or two of solid fun out of 76, even though the game was a bit of a buggy mess and had massive duping bugs that allowed them to make 392719843 stimpacks and becoming literal walking demigods.
Year End Events
For the second year, the Fan Art contest was brought back and for the first time since 2015, the year end awards ceremony was held (This time renamed to The Bimmies instead of The Crewies). The Bimmies were 100% fair and not rigged despite what a vocal contingent keeps saying.
The Pol Shoah & The Rocket Project
With Discord increasingly becoming dumb and gay, a decision was made to finally get rid of all pol chats and channels on the Discord and move them to Rocket.Chat, which is like Discord if it was designed by bigger autists. Now nobody can say the N word anymore (without a pass of course). The decision was met with some initial skepticism by the usual autistic suspects but eventually everyone made the move. (sans a few Feds).
The 2018 Bimmies
For the first time since 2015, the annual COMMIEverse awards show was held, this time as The Bimmies. Voting was done via democracy (and Google Forms) and was 100% legit and no tampering was found at any point despite rumors.
2019 started with a bang when Pigeon dropped one of the hottest fucking tracks in American history, and subsequently won the Fan Art Contest. Football season finally ended which means Taylor finally actually played video games, which meant Saturday Night Gamenight picked back up.
When we founded BMW in 2015, we had very little, actually 0, vision on what the group would become outside of just have a group that played Rust. If you’d told me then that BMW would go on to bully a blind Conservative radio show host, bully Bethesda into sending people canvas bags, and accidentally becoming a “Nazi” breeding ground, well, Id probably believed it because that does sound like some shit I’d get up to. Frankly the fact that we made it this far in as good a shape we have speaks wonders about our core members.
Last May, after the fallout with the SA Discord, I found myself wondering if I still had the old Tay Touch ™. So, I began laying the groundwork for BMW to eventually be handed off to someone else. I spent the next 4 months getting BMW to the point where I felt we could declare victory via BMW 3.0. From there, it was all about vetting a successor. Almost immediately two candidates jumped to the front: Alex and Peaches. Both obviously are super dedicated to making BMW as great as it can be, and last month I decided it was time to finally hand over the reins of this shit wagon hurtling towards the abyss.
So as of this Monday morning at 12AM, I will be officially quitting as leader of BMW, and putting Peaches and Alex in charge.
This doesn’t mean I’m leaving BMW or dropping off the face of the Earth. Ill still be shit posting and calling you all losers, as well as doing the movie night because that’s pretty lit. However, in the coming months/year I will be branching out more into real life. I plan to finally finish the final two semesters of college and IDK MAYBE EVEN GO TO MED SCHOOL LIKE I ORIGINALLY PLANNED IDK MAN. I’m very glad to have met all of you and to have had the pleasure to run this group as long as I have. Being part of this group especially the past year or so has been the greatest pleasure of my long and gay internet career.I know I’ve made a few mistakes and some of y’all may even to this day deeply disagree with the choices I’ve made, but know I did everything I’ve done for the betterment of this group, and it shows. We have one of the more personably and friendly groups of tight knit friends I have ever encountered. Even people who have just recently joined have easily integrated in. I think that’s something we can all be proud of and its something I pray that only gets better with time. It does make me sad in a way to be stepping down, leading shitty gay internet groups has been my raison d’etre since 2012. However, in a lot of ways I think that’s been a scapegoat, hindering me from doing the more important things.
To my replacements I would leave y’all this "wisdom":
- Never allow cliques or ingroups to rule
- Never allow your personal feelings to overrule what’s right for the group
- Don’t be afraid to do or say something controversial if you think it’s right
- Never Split The Group
- Never allow the group to grow idle and stale
To people reading this who are not exactly fans of mine, Id say to not let your feelings regarding Taylor Swift cloud your feelings for the group at large. I’m just one man, and as I’ve said for years and years, “BMW is more than one person”. This represents a true new direction for BMW. Don’t let petty indifference and squabbles hinder greatness.
So in closing, Fuck Goons and Roll Ti(ght)de
P.S. As my last act I pardon Joe— Taylor Swift, "Abdication Post", #announcements, 2/28/2019
BEEFY BOY Revival
With Taylor gone and his One Discord Policy no longer in effect, Prude brought forth the idea to move the political chat that had been moved to Rocket, back to Discord. He proposed using the former spin off discord and one time COMMIE CREW Discord, Beefy Boys, as the prime location to bring back politics. The old COMMIE CREW and Beefy channels were archived and the original channels from the WTT server and some of the newer channels from Rocket were all brought back. WTT leadership was initially wary of the move, fearing it would potentially cause a split, but soon the good effects were noticed as most shitposting and 'isms were being vented in Beefy instead of the main server.
The new found freedom also allowed the Bimmers to begin trolling anew. Initial plans were laid out to find a new target a la Jim Lockwood, and the torment of Goons was renewed.
Division 2 & FFXIV
Hype began right after the Ubisoft conference at E3 2018. The first Division was a bit of a banger with a few Bimmers, but was never a group game. However, after the announcement groups formed up in Division 1 to start generation additional hype. Yall wont believe this but Division 2 launched without any major hitches, bugs, or crashes. Its crazy, I know. Many of the Bimmers rushed to end game, and even had a small rivalry over who could get the highest item level (Hori won, shocker). However, with the raid delayed, content slowly dried up, and the group was left waiting months for something to do. However, when the raid did finally drop in late May, the community in and out of WTT had mostly left the game, and recruiting for the raid was almost impossible, at least in the PC community.
In late April, Hori and Mez convinced the group to give the MMO Final Fantasy XIV a try, mostly due to the 30 day free trial that was being handed out via Twitch Prime. It would remain a staple game for several months, even after the initial burst of interest died down.
Operation Overlard & The Sauce Affair
SA Discord, while dying a slow death, was occasionally resuscitated by TT and some half baked scheme. However, one of these schemes accidentally led to a secret admin channel primarily used for character assassination against Taylor Swift to be leaked. The channel also contained a fair amount of sensitive personal information. Due to TTs involvement with Lowtax, 8chan and KiwiFarms picked up on the matter and began doxxing TT. However, TT in is infinite stupidity, put the blame on Taylor and the Bimmers, concocting an elaborate backstory that Taylor had hacked Brobot and was secretly recording everyones messages, despite the fact that A. Nobody believed it and B. The ample evidence to the contrary. The story was poorly received outside of the most insane and adherent to the Anti-Tay agenda, aka Chaosorb. The entire saga would end with SA Discord being essentially dead, even more so than before, doing only 100-200 messages a day from 10~ people.
In late April and Early May, GESTAPO revealed evidence that The Sauce was leaking opsec channels from BEEFY BOYS and personal information on key Bimmers to Goons. He was summarily banned, with brief pushback from Peaches, who would later step down from leadership over frustration with the entire matter. Alex would from here step up as the sole leader of WTT. Sauce would afterwards have a fairly serious meltdown, and like TT, dreaming up an incredibly elaborate and contrived backstory to justify his actions, but again, falling on deaf ears.
Game Night Return & 6th Golden Age
With Alex as the sole captain of WTT, he began to move the group back in the right direction. One of his first actions was to bring back both the monthly calendar of events and the weekly game nights. Wednesday was slotted as the weekly night for playing Tom Clancys Ghost Recon Wildlands and Sunday was scheduled for the new night for Garrys Mod game mode, Trouble in Terrorist Town. Along with the return of Jack, who had left due to a falling out with Peaches and Sauce in March, the group was in a renewed state of activity, resulting in nightly voice shenanigans for the first time in years, and increased interest in video games.
Late 2019 Lull & The Zoomer Migration
With Alex taking a job in IT, Prude moving for college, and other Bimmers taking up similar new responsibilities, Game Nights and other activities slowed to a crawl. Coupled with Taylor handing off ownership of the Discord to Alex and ending most his duties and weekly events, WTT entered into a new quiet period. However, the group wasnt fully idle. GorzhakCraft, the 7 Days To Die server, and several other games popped up during this time keeping the Bimmers busy. Destiny 2: Shadowkeep and Noita specifically were two big anchors that people rallied around.
Recruitment however, was on a large uptick. Mostly fueled from The Flight of the Touhous and Jack being in weird meme Discords, the last months of 2019 saw an influx in Zoomers who were actually tolerable, most notably Regi and Siayun (damn, imagine).
In October, Alt had a pretty decent melty about CoD or something equally stupid. Taylor had a pretty good melty too but it was more a short ghost than a meltdown.
Year End Events
Birth of the Wideboys
- Taylor - Financier, "content" creator
- Dilbert - Drinker and 日本人 dicker
- Coathanger - Ball Poster Extraordinaire
- Pigeon - "Rap God"
- Solgnir - The Boomer
- Bear in the Woods - A bear in the woods
- Mez - Certified Dindu Destroyer
- Orkledorkle - Bot Toucher, Bike Destroyer
- Sicari - Former Anime God, Current Manga God (For now)
- Alt - Token
- Porkchop - Lowkey Anime Lord
- BustrKc - Chinese Spy
- ScubaSteve - The REAL Boomer
- CapriSunTzu - Gilbert
- Riso - Human Hand Grenade
- Vrath - Currently [REDACTED]